The Discovery of a Witch
By Rev. Valera "Doe Eyes" Childers
I was raised in a very Christian home, specifically Mormon. Now that’s not as bad as most would think. In fact, it was a wonderful upbringing. I love the emphasis that the Mormons put on family, truth and tolerance. And Mormons are, for the most part, good, honest and loving people.
My mother and father divorced when I was 6, so it was just my mother, my brother and I. My brother was, and still is, one of my heroes. We didn’t have much, but I didn’t even notice. My father lived far away and we’d go to visit him during holidays and vacations. It didn’t occur to me that this wasn’t the way “normal” families were and it worked for me. I had a very happy childhood and I feel very blessed and loved.
But as I got older I started to question everything, as every teenager does. I was taught not to question the teachings of the religion I grew up with or waste my time learning about other religions, which always confused me. I wanted to know why the church said that only men could hold the priesthood. What, specifically, is my job here on earth? Why don’t we believe in reincarnation? If we’re supposed to respect all life, why are we not including the Earth, which is a living thing? Why do we all have to believe the exact same thing in order to “get to heaven?”
The problem that I had was when I would ask a question, the answer was always, “when God feels that you’re ready for that answer, you’ll get it.” The idea that I had to wait for some guy sitting up on a throne to be in a good enough mood to give me my answers drove me nuts. It also drove me to finding my own answers.
Then I got a little bit older and started going back to church. I met my now-ex-husband (no, I don’t hate him. In fact, he’s a wonderful friend), had babies and, since I hadn’t really found those answers that I had been seeking before, became confused and unhappy again.
During these years, as well as when I was small, we would visit my paternal grandmother who was a wonderful cook and loved caring for her family. I remember seeing her do little things that she said “gave the food extra love” or “just to take care of my family.” I don’t think she saw what she was doing as Witchcraft, but at its core, it was.
So, towards the end of my marriage I really started questioning again and really started looking for answers. Many, many books later I figured out that what I really was, was a Witch. Yes, it was uncomfortable for me at first. But I knew that I felt more like I was in church when I was out in nature, feeling the elements on my skin and listening to the birds, rather than sitting in big building on a cold pew listening to someone preach at me.
Now I am remarried to a wonderful man and I’ve been a practicing Witch for probably longer than I even realize and have found that comfort and the answers that I had been seeking all along. Most of my family just rolls their eyes and thinks I’m crazy, but they still love me even if they don’t agree with me.
My hope is that my children will be comfortable questioning things and that they will be able to make their own choices according to what is right for them. I hope that I will be able to pass onto them the desire for knowledge and resistance to blindly accepting what they’re told when it comes to religion. I wish them strength of character, love of all that is, love of self, comfort and happiness in being who they are, and desire for knowledge.
I am one happy Witch.
Valera is an owner and a Priestess of The Village Witch. To learn more about here click here.